when you leave,

do not take the one who hurt you,

with you.

— let it stop with you

© Liezel Graham 2019.

I woke up this morning with these lines in my head.

I have not been able to shake them the entire day, so I am sharing them again.

These words have their root in growing up in a home that was at times chaotic.

There is a saying that goes ‘hurt people, hurt other people’.

I believe this to be simplistic, but with a certain truth to its core.

What I do know and what I have seen, is that hurt people can heal. Sometimes, it takes a great deal of work, patience, kindness, honesty and time.

If you are leaving chaos—in whatever form it may be, leave it behind completely—let it end with you.

If you grew up in a place where you were hurt, please seek help to work through your trauma and to heal your wounds. Never be ashamed of your scars.

Be kind to yourself, and gentle.

You are not what was done to you.

You are not what you were told you are.

You are not someone else’s pain.

Trust your instincts and listen to your heart.

May healing be yours,

liezel