…you think you have nothing to offer the world? you think your life is so small there where you are hidden behind the kitchen sink, your nest slowly emptying itself of the soft bodies you have poured your life into.
perhaps the only pilgrimage you know is between home and the school gates, with small detours to find milk and bread.
and how about you, reading this with tired eyes in a tired body, at war with yourself, the pain, and the tiredness, the weight of your unlived life heavy within your bones.
you think you have no purpose here? that your life is a mistake, or perhaps that God has taken her eyes off you for a minute, or maybe since the day you were born, sticking the words ‘unimportant’ on your forehead, and you believing the lie.
why, even this morning, after making the beds, and whilst sitting at my kitchen table with only my words, a cup of tea, and the faint smell of heather that always lingers in the air after God leaves, i walked into a place where i was shown words that fell in anger from a soft mammal body’s mouth—a stranger whom i will likely never meet, how she chose to plant war and destruction in the life of another, and not only there, but in the lives of each person they love: ‘may all the people they love suffer forever and ever’… her mouth, in that moment, a weapon, and too wrapped up in her own anger, she did not even realise the hooks she was casting into other realms, how far they travel, but how hooks are always connected to something—how they hold people captive for years, and years, and lives, and lives, and some of us wondering at the losses that plague our doors.
do you know the extent of this kind of warfare?
how many lives might be shaped by it?
other soft bodies that have done no wrong.
we are all soft bodies who don’t realise the power of what we are speaking over the shape of our own days; the shape of the lives of the ones who are still to follow after us.
entire generations can get caught up in these flaming nets.
i once thought my life hidden and without the spine of purpose. i once thought myself unimportant, believing so many things that were given to me by others who had been eating plates of violence for centuries.
this has been my life’s work: first the unlearning, the walking away, the refusing to eat what i was given, and then, learning how to pull the hooks from my own life, and from the life of my son.
do you know how many wars i step into, for strangers, on behalf of soft mammal bodies that i will never know, my presence unseen, wielding only my words as weapons.
with my mouth i say:
‘no. not for this family. not for these people. not for the ones caught in the crossfire of someone’s poor decisions.’
with my mouth i say:
‘in the back of this ambulance there is fear, but there shall be no loss of life here today. let there be hope and the pulsing body of life. stay for a little while longer, stay for the people who will miss your presence if you were to give up now.’
with my mouth i say:
‘here, let me plant grace, let me plant hope and healing and joy. let me be the witness-with-the-message, the mother-who-sees, the one who steps into the gap and deflects the arrow.’
with my mouth i say:
‘be careful what you plant in the lives of others. be careful which side you choose to dwell with. words have wings, and they always return home. i shall plant grace over your life instead, just for now, just until you can see with your own eyes how far a word can travel.’
you think you have nothing to offer this world, even though you have been eating the light, unseen, for years in your small, ordinary world?
listen to me! now is the time to open your mouth and to let your water-words find hot wars to pour themselves over.
there are flames everywhere waiting to be found by eyes that have the time to see them.
shall i say it again? a reminder? listen!
the world is weeping and there is tender work to be done. warriors come in every shape and size, and there are healers all around, and messages waiting to be plucked from the ether, waiting to be turned into shields.
© liezel graham 2023
{image by Greg Rakozy on Unsplash}
i don’t think this needs any explanation.
it will either sit with you, or not.
it doesn’t take away its truth. you might try, for a short season, to speak hope and life over your own body, perhaps the body of someone with whom you have had a quarrel.
plant life and grace and freedom, and you will find those words returning to you with life in their wings.
your life is not hidden, not common, not without purpose.
you have eyes, and ears, and a mouth, and words.
you have time and life and presence.
do you even know how much of a warrior that makes you?
you have the power of life and death in your mouth.
go on, brave healer! step into your purpose.
the world is weeping and there is tender work to be done.
{the line, ‘the world is weeping and there is tender work to be done‘ is originally from my poem, The World is Weeping, which is in my second book, A Counting of Love}

Dear Liezel – thank you so much for sharing your meditation circle. I do much sitting/inner listening/meditation, but seldom have done so within a circle of others; at least not within the last decades, and not often with a guided theme. It was powerful and enriching. I signed on mostly because I wanted to get a chance to see/feel/hear you in person (via zoom) as well as in your poetry, which I dearly love. I don’t have much money, so won’t be signing on on a regular basis for any of your series, but when it works (when I have a helper available to be with my special needs adult son) I’ll sign up for your free monthly sessions. It was nurturing, a lived reminder of where to find my strength, my presence, as I feel and see all the world around me in these troubled days. I am a member of a weekly group that you might be interested in. There is a FB page called something like Archeology of a Woman’s Soul. Corina, the woman behind that page, is a poet, and she has a group of women who meet each Friday from 12-1, central time (Chicago) in the US . Most, but not all of us, are poets. The group is called Poesy Healers. What happens there is that each of us brings a poem that speaks deeply to our hearts at the moment, and speak/read it aloud to and for the others present. Often it is our own poems we share, but not always. There is no critique or analysis or philosophizing about the poems, but a few words honoring the reading and what it touches. It is weekly highlight for me, though I’m not always able to attend. I think you would love this circle of women if you are drawn to check it out and have that hour available. Just wanted to share. Again, thank you for today. Sara
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Dear Sara, thank you so much for your beautiful words and your kindness. It means so much to me. I would be so honoured to see you at the meditations whenever you are able to attend. I am not sure if you know, but my son is autistic, apart from the diabetes, and although he is 15 years old, he is like a much younger child. I home educate him and I relate very much to how we have to share ourselves and our time and I just wanted to honour that in your life. I am going to look into the group that you mentioned. It sounds like something I would really love. Thank you for being there this evening and for sharing your practice with me. It was such a blessing. xx
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Dear Liezel, thank you! My son is 47, has down syndrome, autism, and PTSD. He is God’s greatest gift to my life. Yes, time, energy, planning, all are involved in our day to day lives, but I am so so thankful for what I learn with and from him, of life, of love, of LIVING love….. Through his eyes I have learned to see differently…… It sounds like your son gifts you in similar ways. We are both blessed.
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Oh, that is a whole lot of things that he has had to carry… and you. Yes, my boy is my greatest teacher. Everything that I know about unconditional love, I have learnt from him. He is such a gift. Sara, I have just put up the new free meditation session and you are so welcome to join if you would like. Here is the link: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/748643241087?aff=oddtdtcreator
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Thank you. Yes, I signed up. Sundays are tricky with helpers, so if I have trouble making those arrangements I’ll let you know soon enough that someone else can use my ticket.
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