For many women it is a happy day where they are celebrated and loved that wee bit extra.
Happy Mother’s Day to you!
…but, if your arms are empty, or if your womb and your heart has only known loss, if you are grieving a child, grieving a mother, grieving any woman who has loved you like a mother, if you are a mum who has fallen again, and again—who knows bitter disappointment, shame and failure as friends, then I send you love today.
For the fathers who have to be mothers, too—you are doing just fine.
For the grannies, that are mums again, for the stepmums who have had to step into new shoes—you are doing just fine.
for some of us, learning to let go of security and the need to control things beyond our control—deciding every fresh morning to let go of what we think our tomorrows should look like, learning to live in the moment, can be the bravest thing we ever do.
I don’t like posting twice on the same day, but I really want to put this one up tonight.
You cannot be the source of someone’s happiness, peace and joy.
It is not your job.
And sometimes, we are told this from a very young age and all we know from thereon out, is that we need to keep the peace… we don’t learn that we can challenge opinions, and say ‘no’ to things that make us uncomfortable.
we become people pleasers with a skewed sense of love.
we think that we have to somehow earn the ‘i love you’s’ by being the source to people who don’t know where to find it themselves, or don’t want to find it themselves.
you are not a crutch.
you were a given a life.
go and live it!
With a grateful nod to Melissa T, for a line that I used in this poem.